Hi y’all! With the new year fast approaching my focus has been on how to be a better mom. (These steps are perfect for DADS too!)
I know a lot of people think that just because the calendar changes so will things in their life. However, unless we actually put in the effort to change what we dislike, then our next year will simply be a repeat of this year.
So if your goal is to be a better mom then here’s my top 5 solutions to help you out!
P.S.- I am working on these as well…Lord knows I am not perfect!😉
Disclaimer- I AM NOT a professional therapist, doctor, or counselor. These suggestions are simply ideas that have worked for my family. If you are looking for professional help, please discontinue reading now. But if you are interested in some helpful tips I encourage you to read on!
How to be a better mom
Solution #1: Open your ears and shut your mouth
This is probably my hardest issue. I want my kids to hear what I have to say and follow it. But I rarely want to take the time to listen to what the “actual” issue is.
Mommas, sometimes we may think we know what started the fight between our kiddos but we somehow missed the part where the youngest started it all by flicking his brother in the head. (All we heard is the older brother screaming at the little guy.)
So, what I am realizing is that sometimes we need to take a step back and hear ALL sides of the story before any punishment is handed out. Also try talking to your kids instead of an automatic punishment. Let them know that situation could’ve been handled very differently. Then show them a solution to fix the problem.
Solution #2: Be slow to anger
There are days when nothing is going how I planned, the kids have broken 5 toys and want them fixed now, and my sanity has reached its breaking point. Then there’s one little mishap that ends it all and I blow up! (Does this sound familiar mommas?) Then I feel awful and I apologize to my family for my behavior. (I HATE my own behavior in this situation.)
So I decided to change it! Stressing myself out over not getting the bathroom cleaned is not worth it if it causes me to yell at my kids.
Yes, I know I cannot avoid stress or becoming overwhelmed. However, I can control how I let it affect my reaction. I have found that most things I stress over is simply all in my head. I have convinced myself that my day is ruined because of it. So my solution is to convince myself that it is ok to save a load of laundry for tomorrow. It’s ok if I missed a week publishing a blog post because of the holidays. My family is MORE important than any other situation.
Keeping your mind clear and your heart happy is key to controlling anger and tart words!
Solution #3: Be the example
This solution kind of goes hand in hand with #2. If we want our kids to talk kindly then we must first show them how. 90% of the time our kids are going to mimic our actions. (This is not a scientific fact, just my guesstimate.) If we yell at traffic, they will too. If we bite our fingernails, they will also. (The list can go on and on.) So bettering our actions and how to speak to (or about) people will help us to raise better children.
This is the hardest solution but I guarantee you that it is the most beneficial (or at least it has been for me).
Solution #4: Make quality time for your family
Our lives are filled with an incredible amount of to-do’s. Moms take care of everyones schedule with little time left for our own. Between homework, sports, work, and chores at home our time is stretched thin. But one thing that I am finding in this beautiful mess is that 10 minutes of quality time with our family is a game changer!
Even though our kids get older and start having lives of their own, they still want mom and dads attention and affection. They need to know that they are most important in our lives. So if that means taking 10 minutes to play Pictionary before bed then do it! The benefits you will reap far outweigh the sleep you lost.
For some fun quality time ideas check out my posts How To Spend Quality Time With Your Kids and 20+ Christmas/Winter Activities The Entire Family Will Love.
Solution #5: How to be a better mom by Prioritizing
Like I said above, we have A LOT on our plates. And sometimes the small things overshadow the important things.
Our family should be our top priority. Everything we do is for them. But don’t let what we do make us forget who we are doing it for.
I have to admit that sometimes I let housework take priority over my kids. They will need help with a word in the book they are reading and I will say “not right now I’m busy”. Obviously I know that learning to read is way more important than folding laundry. But this is what happens when we don’t prioritize correctly.
Prioritizing is great for any situation! But it’s a necessity when it comes to our children. Now I am not saying that you should ignore everything around you and jump to your child’s beckon call. (They also need to learn patience.) But I am saying to not get so wrapped up in the lesser priorities that you forget the GREATEST priority of all!
To help you keep your life prioritized correctly sign up HERE for my FREE one page planner! Or if you are looking for something a little more detailed go to my Etsy shop and check out my 6 Page Printable Planner Packet.